harvey barnes Crack City (part 2)

story by Norm and Paul
music by Dave

Some "Cleans" will even engage in this perverse activity just to keep the ruse up-- But secretly they are attempting to mobilize a resistance against the Aliens. they are stockpiling gunpowder, bullets, firecrackers, fertilizer, car batteries, gasoline cans and bottles of pure ethanol-- They plan on mounting an offensive three eggs from now-- Their plans of course become nullified if next time they land, They decide to simply wipe the rest of us out. The name's Hillary P Vimps. I work for the Resistance, but aint no Clean. I huff more crack hits than Whitney Houston, but I'm the best there is at what I do. I'm in charge of gathering intelligence on these Alien cocksuckers. I've already assembled a file on them more detailed than Darwin's dicklice. I know (for example) that Michael J Fox was the first Alien implant released for mass consumption-- A hermaphrodytic leper from the Horsehead Nebula-- Then Ronnie Reagan was flown in from Alpha Centauri on a nuclear timewarp saucer and once he was in office you had Michael Jackson, Joan Rivers, Bono, Sting, and all thse goddamn Aliens coming in, buying up the planet-- no one suspected a thing-- until Obama's eyes turned to two beetle black bulging eggs on national TV press conference and next thing the whole shit house blows wide open-- Slaughter the likes of Hiroshima put to the scale of ants-- Armafuckinggeddon!-- And now they want me to Clean up this mess?-- well I'm just the motherfucker for the job. I lit a blast of that fine Alien coke and sat back. I already knew seven words in the Aliens's language: "Preebers" meant "Humans"; "Dlaa-gorp" meant "crack-cocaine" (not sure which element is which however) etcetera. it is an ugly, unbeauteous language of bodily bleeps and gloops, the language crustaceans would speak were the capable. A knock suddenly came at the door-- It was my neighbor, Chuck-- I let him in and let him smoke a few hits of my crack-- His bloodshot eyes radiated pure pain until the drug smoke rushed out of his mouth in a dense white vaportrail and he fazed back into the sofa, the dead red eyes now glazing over as a twitching, rottentooth smile spread across Chuck's wrinkled, leathery face. "Shit man," he says "When I first met you, I thought ya was a fucking Clean, man". I laughed. "You've got to be joking". Chuck's girl-fiend, who was actually posing as a Clean to gain access to the ethanol supply (she drank it) came in, sloshed as usual. Her hair was bleached almost white, and there were huge bald spots where she'd been pulling it out in back. I let her bum a few hits as well. They never had any money, and their groceries all came from some dumpster. Everything was running out for people like them. Sometimes I wonder if they're even worth saving.

Chuck's girlfriend's name was Sally. Most people figured she had lost her mind right after the first invasion. She was forced to watch her own parents be chopped up in a massive meat grinder by a rather vicious street gang called The Loco Vatos. An all Mexican gang of about 90 that were some of the craziest blood thirsty dope fiends left in the city. Sally had been gang raped by all the Loco Vatos and her vagina was infected with every STD known to man. The Loco Vatos had filmed the gang rape and posted it on their web sight for all the other gangs to see. This had infuriated Chuck and he swore revenge on all The Loco Vatos. Sally was also convinced that the Aliens had been capturing her and doing their own sexual experiments on her rotted out vagina. She was convinced they had implanted a hybrid mutant baby in her womb with the face of David Hasselhoff. I use to think Sally and Chuck were both under cover Cleans but I soon realized that was impossible after many a late night drug session with them. And Sally wasn't as crazy as one might think. Her, Chuck and me had an all night LSD crack MDMA Nitrous oxide Salvia party at my place one night. she wanted to show me and Chuck something so we would stop laughing at her. She was very agitated, walking around in circles mumbling gibberish while pulling huge white chunks of her hair out after a 2 week no sleep meth binge that I was not invited to. She pulled down her nasty corroded spandex jumpsuit from her massive camel toed fupar and bent over for me and Chuck, spreading her thick gravy dripping oatmeal caked diseased ridden butt cheeks. I couldn't believe my eyes. But sure enough a massive brown blood dripping algae colored turd began slowly coming out her anal crevice. It was about the size of a watermelon. It sprouted miniature red hands out each side with long black nails that wiggled around while Sally let out a scream of horror and pain. It would suck back up into her butt hole and squirm back out every few minutes, each time another mutant hand or foot sprouting from it.

harvey barnes Crack City (part 2)
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